About
My husband looks into my eyes and says, “I am so sorry. I love you.”
I reach for his hand and accept his apology, communicating it with my touch and my smile. We may not be perfect, we may hurt each other from time to time, but we continue to choose one another and we continue the practice of our marriage.
Let’s be honest, even with the best of intentions we will hurt the ones we love and they will hurt us too. That doesn’t make us bad or awful. It makes us human.
We all come into relationship with our own past experiences, wounds, triumphs, and beliefs. Sometimes these will help you connect and sometimes they’ll drive you apart. I know this all too well from my own experiences. I know it’s true for my clients too.
The Practice of Being Human
To be human in a relationship and in sex is an ongoing, unfolding practice.
Practice is defined as doing something again and again in order to become better at it. Isn’t that what we’re all trying to achieve? A better relationship, a better sex life, a better life overall.
Perfection is not the goal. Being better than yesterday is what it’s all about.
A practice is informed by things that came before. Let me tell you a little more about who I am and how it has formed my practice as a professional, as a wife, and as a human seeking to create a better life.
The Process of Affirming My Own Humanity
Today, I am in the relationship I always longed for. With intention, honesty and a desire to learn together, my husband and I have created our ideal marriage. Our relationship is a daily practice built on mindful personal and mutual growth.
This dedication to my own growth is what allows me to show up as ME in my partnership and in life. It wasn’t always like this for me.
As a teen, I chose to cope with my chaotic, painful childhood with an eating disorder. But, with the guidance of my own therapist, I clawed my way out and emerged as the woman I am today. I know that I am a perpetual work in progress and that awareness has allowed me to be the truest version of myself - perfectly imperfect in every way!
People often ask me how I came to be a therapist. The answer is simple: therapy saved my life.
Therapy empowered me. It taught me that I was human. It showed me the power of affirming my own humanity and the humanity of others. Therapy continues to be a part of my relationship and self care.
A Therapy Practice that Affirms Our Collective Humanity
My therapy practice is based on affirming our collective humanity.
This is what I want you to understand through our work together: you’re human and you’re not perfect. Every day is going to be different and your relationship is going to shift and change and that’s OK as long as you’re evolving individually and with the one you love. It’s in this intentional evolution that you craft a relationship practice that makes life a little better every day.
Something essential differentiates me from most relationship therapists: I also help unpack your sexuality so you can create the physical intimacy you crave, desire, and deserve.
Sexual Empowerment Coach Amy Jo Goddard says it perfectly: “the more whole we are as sexual beings, the more fulfilled we are as human beings.” I hope to help you discover that sense of wholeness in our time together.
I’d like to help you develop your practice of being human in your relationship and in your sexual life. Connect with me at 970.414.0954 and we’ll schedule your complimentary 15 minute consultation.
Education
I hold a Doctor of Education (EdD) in Human Sexuality and a Doctor of Human Sexuality (DHS) from the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, California. I graduated with honors with my Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy from Regis University in Denver, Colorado. I also hold a Bachelors of Arts in Behavioral Sciences with a minor in Elementary Education.
Professional Memberships
I am a member of the Colorado Counseling Association (CCA) and the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT).I invite you to connect with me at 970.414.0954 and we’ll schedule your complimentary 15 minute consultation.
Dr. Lily Zehner
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